Do You Have the Audacity to Get Engaged?

When I was engaged, I spent nearly every waking hour thinking about my soon-to-be wife.  Virtually every spare minute was spent looking for ways to show her how much I cared.  I’m amazed by how romantic I was back then, and frankly a little embarrassed at how far removed from those involvements I can become today.  But that’s the subject for a different blog.  The word audacity means boldness or daring, especially with confident disregard for personal safety, conventional thought, or other restrictions.  The term engaged means deeply involved or occupied with another.  As humans, and particularly as Americans, our culture tends to put all of the focus on us.  Therefore it almost seems audacious to engage people around us.  After all, we may never even see them again.  (All the more reason to make the most of this opportunity.)  But we have an opportunity- shoot, even a responsibility- as Christians to become engaged with those we find ourselves around each day.  There’s someone that needs encouragement, a kind word, or a pleasant smile just feet from us each day.  Disengaging from the worries and business of our minds will free up the mental energy to pay the attention required to impact someone else positively.  After all, Jesus said that the most important commandments were to “Love the Lord… and to love your neighbor as yourself.”  If you are like most of us, you may not even know your neighbor next door, but we have people all around us most days.  Let’s have the Guts, the Raw Fortitude, and the Audacity to Get Engaged.

Getting Back to God's Idea

We as Christians are the Church, not merely members of a church but the composition of The Church itself.  We who have come to Christ, are a house made up of living stones being built by the Lord as we grow in maturity and in our numbers.   The building is not the church, so we no longer ”go to church”. The church is not as series of events, so we don’t “attend church”. The church is not a standard set of rituals, or practices, so we don’t “do church” These false concepts must be shed in order for us to truly accomplish what the Lord had in mind for us in the beginning. When the church doesn't function in the manner that it was intended to it's difficult for it to accomplish the purpose for which it was established.  In the early days of the church,  gatherings were conducted in public places as well as in private homes, but the church was being lived out everywhere that Christians went. For the church is constructed of living stones, the people of God.  I would suggest to you that Christ intended for us to go live Him out in whatever venue we are in   We need to be fully committed to discovering what God intended the church to be and then helping the believers around us to be just that,                                                                            The Church.  

A Good Looking Hypocrite

"Here's another way to put it: You're here to be light, bringing out the God-colors in the world. God is not a secret to be kept. We're going public with this, as public as a city on a hill. If I make you light-bearers, you don't think I'm going to hide you under a bucket, do you? I'm putting you on a light stand. Now that I've put you there on a hilltop, on a light stand—shine! Keep open house; be generous with your lives. By opening up to others, you'll prompt people to open up with God, this generous Father in heaven. Matthew 5:13-15

Keep open house.  Well, that would require me to keep a clean house.  Now, my wife and I have people in our home every week, so the place gets a lot of traffic every Sunday.  Add to that two boys living there- well, three now that I think of it- and it’s a wonder the place is still standing.  I think the above passage that urges us to keep open house is suggesting not only that we open our homes to others, but that we share our lives with them as well.  You see, when people come over, they get to see all of your stuff.  Even our junk rooms and drawers end up getting laid out bare before others.  I think that’s part of what Jesus wanted- Authentic Living.  

Authentic Living

I once heard it said that character is looking the same in private as you do in public, or maybe you have heard the question, “Who are you when no one is looking?” I like to use the construction term Integrity.  It means consistency of strength.  If a bridge is built with steel that looks good on the outside but is full of air pockets and weak welds, it may look really good but come crashing down as the traffic begins to cross it.  You may be one of those all-or-nothing type of people who read this and think that you have to be perfect; that your every private action needs to be bathed in perfection, or you are nothing but just a good-looking hypocrite. 

A Good Looking Hypocrite

Well, if you struggle with acting the same in front of people as you do when no one is looking, you are in good company.  First off, no one is perfect all of the time.  Many of us fake perfection when we are around unbelievers to sort of sell Christianity as this magic pill that makes you perfect if you just pray the sinner’s prayer (whatever that is).  This is counter-productive because when new believers (or at least those that took the magic pill) start to struggle with their old ways- like the second day of their Christian walk- then they figure they didn’t really have a supernatural, change-oriented experience. This leads to legalism or cynicism.  Many others of us fake perfection when around other believers so that we will look good, be a part of the “in” crowd at church, or at least feel good about our choices a few hours a week.

I happen to like Paul’s writings (you know Paul, the one who was Holy Spirit inspired to write the majority of the new part of the Bible) where he says:

“For I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing”  Rom. 7:19

I think there is something to be said for growth in Christian maturity for sure.  I‘m just betting that it doesn’t come from disciplining yourself to live up to the law.  Otherwise why would Christ’s sacrifice be necessary?  True transformation of behavior comes from a transformed heart and a renewed mind, both of which the scripture seems to point out happen as we get to know Jesus better and better. 

The consistency or integrity that comes from authentic living doesn’t demand perfection, but realism.  People need to see our good, our bad, and even our ugly.  It’s the same principle I try to use in parenting.  When I fail or blow it with my kids, I make sure to point out my mistake to them and say that I’m sorry and ask for their forgiveness.  You see, I don’t want to foster in them the idea that it’s okay to act like ours doesn’t stink.  It’s incredibly beneficial to my kids, my brothers and sisters in Christ, as well as my unbelieving friends to see how someone who is friends with Jesus deals with their own failures.  I don’t flaunt my freedom to sin and get away with it thanks to the sacrifice of Christ.  On the contrary, I highlight not just my struggles, but my repentance.  Not so that I can get to heaven but because it’s good for me and it is the right thing to do.  You see, regardless of my failures, I believe Jesus is happy with me and I try to let people know that.  I’m convinced he is paying attention to my successes instead of my failures, and as I get to know him better and better, my failures decrease and my successes increase.  I think they call this a batting average in baseball, and you can be sure that God’s not keeping track of yours.  

2 Corinthians 11:30 “If I must boast, I will boast of the things that show my weakness.”

So open up your house and your life to others.  You and they will find it refreshing.  It’s also attractive to people who are hurting and hungry for something real.  If you have a hard time accepting this, ask God to show you if it’s because you really needed to hear it. 

“For God was in Christ, reconciling the world to himself, no longer counting people’s sins against them. And he gave us this wonderful message of reconciliation.”   2 Corinthians 5:19

Leaving a Legacy

One of the Christian bands that I love to listen to for encouragement and fun is a group called Sanctus Real.  They have a song out called “Legacy”.  One line of the lyrics from the song states, “Free me , my hands are tied , I'm so tired of wasting time, these endless inventions steal my attention from real life”.  How ironic that the age of technology allows us to be even busier in the 24-hour cycle of our day.  I realized this recently when my smart phone notified me with a ding in the middle of the night that someone had “posted” something “on my wall”, terms which didn’t even exist until recent years.  As I lay there a bit disgusted that I was awakened by the sound, I could not get back to sleep because of the nagging question, “Who was posting on my wall in the middle of the night, and what did they say?”  Maybe it was a friend in need of prayer, or someone hoping for a listening ear, maybe even an opportunity to share God’s love.  Maybe it was someone commenting on one of the many wonderful things which I had posted on my own wall in the last few days.  Well, soon enough I got up and made the journey across the room to solve the mystery. 

Our tools for connection are greater today than ever before, and our opportunities for entertainment are no less great.  I actually know people with way over three hundred TV channels on their cable box.  Add to that the possibility of streaming movies from Netflix or one of their carbon copies (which we don’t use any more, by the way) and you have a full slate of opportunities right in your home, and that’s not even counting the endless options from gaming system manufacturers.  You can be an all-star at virtually any sport, exercise your hand/eye coordination, and do your duty defending the country while saving the world from the bad guys while keeping track of the number of kills.

Are all of these things bad?  Not necessarily, but they do provide us with an even better reason to be intentional about where we choose to spend our time.  Unlike money, we can’t borrow time.  We all only have 24 hours in a day, and after limiting our sleep, neglecting our children and spouses to squeak out a little more, we still can only spend 24 hours a day doing anything.  What’s my point?  I recently read that the word “entertainment” is derived from a Latin word which I probably can’t pronounce and won’t bore you with, but the meaning of the word is “something providing a pleasurable escape or a diversion for the mind.”  My natural response to reading this was to ask, “A pleasurable diversion from what?”  A quick look around our world tells us just what people need diverted from.  Pain, depression, strife, frustration, debt, wars, rumors of wars, tragedies here and there, too much month at the end of the money, broken relationships, bad politics, and the list goes on.   But I would like to suggest to you that the enemy of us all uses the problems of this world to get us to self-medicate on entertainment.  Why would he do such a thing?  Because thoughtless, mind-numbed, busy individuals rarely recognize the fact that each of us was created with a destiny.  Destiny literally means divine purpose.  God, the ultimate Creator doesn’t make useless, purposeless people.  Each of us has the DNA of our God-plan written right on our hearts.  It’s not the sort of “have to follow God’s will for your life” sort of stuff that we have come to see as undesirable, but it’s hidden there in your heart, tucked  neatly between your most significant desires and fond dreams.  When we get away from it all, we at first find boredom, quickly followed by anxiety and hand wringing, followed by the deeper questions of what are we doing with our lives.  Not the sort of condemnation-oriented thoughts like, “Jesus died for you, so suck it up and get out there and serve him,” but the thoughts like, “What will I regret not having tried if I were to close my eyes tonight and never open them again?”

Let me encourage you to take a self test.  Go unplugged for 24 hours.  Shoot, try even just twelve hours (not counting sleep).  Hang out with some good friends for an evening (the real kind, not the kind from social media that you may have never met).  Ask yourself and your friends things like “What would you do if you knew you couldn’t fail?”  “What’s the most exciting thing to happen to you recently?”  Endeavoring to recover your sense of destiny and encourage each other to change the way you think. Help each other, not in the sort of “have to spur one another on to do things which we should do but don’t want to do,” but be encouraging each other to move forward in relationship with Jesus, the one who said, "Are you tired?  Worn out?  Burned out on religion?  Come to me.  Get away with me and you'll recover your life.  I'll show you how to take a real rest.  Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it.  Learn the unforced rhythms of grace.  I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you.  Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly."  Matthew 11:28

P.S.  I love it when people post on my wall, even in the middle of the night J.

Desperation for Anything but God Leads to Bondage

I’m an Idea Guy.  The problem is that I often short-circuit myself by pursuing ideas that seem good at the time but, when evaluated in light of more information (and I think that’s what wisdom is- the application of true knowledge), I become painfully aware that the idea was not good for me to pursue at that time.  I recently took a job helping people at a company with an excellent reputation because I was running short of work in my renovation business.  A friend told me about an opening at the company, and I took a look at their job posting.  The job description seemed like something I had done in the past and had really enjoyed; however, the wording of the posting was fairly vague, and I immediately started filling in the blanks of my questions with assumption-oriented answers.  I had the job all worked out in my head to be just a slight variation on my past job’s description.  To make a long story short, three days into a six-week long training, it was becoming painfully clear to me that most of this job was not going to be enjoyable to me at all.  I spent several hours with others who were doing what I would be doing in just six short weeks.  Watching and listening to them, I heard my heart sort of gasp, as if this job (the real one- not the one in my head) was going to be sort of a prison for me.  It removed all of my flexibility, which is very much needed for someone who is helping to plant a new church.  It very much limited my ability to excel in the areas that I know that I am good at and would force me to spend nearly a full third of my time doing things which I knew I despise.  Well, maybe this is sort of a disciplining I am receiving form the Lord, I thought.  Like God enjoys forcing us to do things over and over again that we don’t find fulfilling.  Like He is just going to do whatever it takes for me to learn the lessons I seem to fail to comprehend.  I cried out “Why, God?” in my head from the shackled state which I had decided to occupy.  Then His words came to me: “Did you ask me about taking this job, or did you just assume that because it was helping people, at a company with an excellent reputation, and because you needed income, that it was a God-send?”  I poured over my memories for the one where I had spent time asking God to show me if this was a good job for me, and I realized that I had no such memory.  This happened to me because I had been operating from a place of desperation.  I need money, so I need this job.  I do remember praying, “God, don’t let them offer this job to me unless it’s part of your plan for my life,” but while that prayer was sincere, it sort of fell into the vein of the prayers I prayed as a teenager like, “God, please make the girl I like want to date me.”  The point is that God usually doesn’t violate the free will that He has chosen to give each of us, and God forcing the employer to hire me would be like Him being the ultimate puppet master, pulling all the strings behind the scenes to bring about the desired result.  While we like to think of Him that way when we want something for ourselves, we don’t like to think of Him that way with regard to being forced to do things by an omnipotent God. 

Now for some perspective:  I do believe in pursuing good ideas.  In fact, I can’t think of too many times we are more Christ-like than when we are being creative in our thought processes.  I just believe that our good ideas ought to be tested in light of as much truth as one can obtain ahead of time, and then acted upon in faith if they pass that test.  I do understand that God is omnipotent and could force things to happen, but I also know that He is omniscient and knows what decisions people will make and uses them to bring about His plan as well.  As for the job, I consulted my wife, prayed over it, slept on it, and resigned on my fourth day to an employer who was very gracious and thanked me for doing it now instead of six weeks from now after much money and effort had gone into training me for the job.  I walked away from that conversation with a ton of weight off of my shoulders and a better perspective on decision making. Any decision made in fear, or out of desperation for anything other than God, ends up leading me into bondage to the negative emotion that led me to make the decision in the first place.   As for my needs, the first few hours after resigning netted me several bid jobs that will take care of my budget for the month.        

“We pray for you all the time—pray that our God will make you fit for what he's called you to be, pray that he'll fill your good ideas and acts of faith with his own energy so that it all amounts to something.” 2 Thessalonians 1:11